Relationships are complicated.
We all have our own opinion about how they should work. How are these expectations affecting the intimate connection with your spouse? Blaming others for the problems in your marriage is a useless proposition. Conflict is imminent in any relationship if you are simply going through the motions on a daily basis.
The solution ...
It is important to check your perspective and take a look at yourself. A fulfilling marriage is reliant on the independent efforts of two people becoming the best versions of themselves. The issues in most relationships have nothing to do with the present situation. Confront adversity by restoring an authentic bond with your significant other.